Wishworld, Endings and Beginnings V

"Shut up for a minute, will ya? I need to concentrate for this."

Jason tightened his focus towards the oncoming car. His skin tensed as spiderlines of subtle energy fanned out from his consciousness, seeking out and wrapping around barely visible grains of sand in the air.

In the back of his mind was a small theatre where he watched himself get hit by a car over and over again.

Quit it, he thought, pushing the vision away. Of course, the premonition only intensified as the car drew closer.

Warning bells exploded in his head.

Stupid second sight, he thought angrily. Stupid Keith Lester.

Events slowed down for Jason at times like these, but when he was in any kind of danger, even when it was deliberate, his threat sense would continue to launch warning like suicide bombers against his central consciousness. Sometimes, this made fine control so hard...

He wrenched his thoughts free of all distractions. Then the grains of sand converged on the car and the force of his will turned them to glass.

The vision disappeared, and suddenly there was no problem at all.

"Wii are the good guys here, Jason. Remember that."

Eliot heard Pia's voice through speakers at his ear. The sound was so realistic that he could imagine her standing right next to him. He ran his fingers over the controls of the ship he was flying. The Hot Dog.

The Hot Dog represented the holy grail of sapien science, the product of a thousand years of technological advancement. It was equipped with various weapons, including energy beams, gas jets, liquid nitrogen emitters, plasma cannons and hull armor capable of withstanding devastating amounts of damage. The Hot Dog could lift weights in excess of 75 tons and could fly at 225 miles per hour. And those were only the preliminary specs. The Hot Dog possessed so many complex functions and abilities Eliot himself was not aware of them all.

"Guys." He spoke into his headset. "Come on. Back to the Mansion. We should really get going."

---

On the inside of the glass cage Jason had created for the perpetrators, two masked criminals lay inside the badly damaged car, still in their seats. Another had been thrown free by the impact and impaled on a wicked spike rising from the floor. There were shards of glass everywhere.

One of the survivors stirred. Slowly, he sat up and took in his surroundings.

"Oh shit. Ace!" He shook the unconscious man. "Pull it together! We can't stay here!"

Ace rolled over on the dashboard, mumbling incoherently. The other man pulled a handgun from his shoulder holster and fired a shot into the frame of the car. Ace woke with a start.

"What the hell? Azfar-?!"

"They got us." Azfar said simply. "And you should remember we're still on the field."

"Yeah, you're right - BLANK! FUCK!" The two of them finally spotted their third party member.

A small explosion blew one side of the car open. “Oh man this is bad!” Azfar climbed out of his seat and ran towards the spot where Blank lay in an impossible position, suspended by the stalagmite that had taken his life.

“That is the deadest corpse I have ever seen.” Azfar looked away from the body.

Ace kicked viciously at the car door. It fell open. "What the hell is this? Glass?" He walked over to the walls of his prison.

“It’s glass.” Azfar was examining the walls as well. “There are a hell lot of impurities, but you can see a bit of the outside. Remember the sand clouds around us earlier? Someone must have turned the sand into glass just like that. What kind of person has that kind of power?”

“Who gives?” Ace picked up a sword from the floor of the car. “They’re dead. Detonator, break us out of here. Time to teach these punks a lesson in fury.”

---

There are two references in this installation. See if you can spot both. I might decide to colour the comic, the main reason why I'm undecided on this is because it took hours just to get it online in black and white. The scanning and lettering processes are like my own personal hell.

Anyway, Wishworld is officially back. What did you think of the latest episode?

Oh, and by the way those bastards at the Star stole my date. People like Mahadi and Sabrina will remember me talking about it. It just makes me so mad.

Now for some Kingdom Hearts. Did you know that Sora can actually use Trinity Limit alone?

Tributes?

This should make up your mind on the color/black and white issue. Not that the color is at my best, but then again neither is the black and white version. Wishworld this Saturday/Sunday. Can't confirm, cause I'm still busy with IU Day preps.

The Story of Spiderman India.

Pavitr Prabhakar, a poor Indian boy, lives in a village and moves to Mumbai with his aunt Maya and uncle Bhim to study after getting half a scholarship. His parents died some years ago. Other boys at the school tease him and beat him. He knows his uncle Bhim is struggling to support him and his aunt Maya, and pay the school. Only Meera, a girl from school, befriends him. Meanwhile, Nalin Oberoi, a local crime lord, uses an amulet to perform an ancient ritual, where he gets possessed by a demon committed to opening the gate for other demons to get back to Earth. While being chased by other kids, Pavitr encounters an ancient god who gives him the power of a spider, to fight the evil that threatens the world. While discovering his powers, Pavitr refuses to help a woman being attacked by several men. He leaves the place, but comes back when he hears his uncle cry, who was stabbed when he tried to help the woman. Thus Pavitr understands that with great power comes great responsibility.

One link for Pavitr Prabhakar.

One for the Bollywood dude who's going to play him in the Spiderman: India movie.

You heard me. Shahrukh Khan, motherfuckers. They are making a movie, and there will be dancing. And palm trees.

Pavitr and the Oberoi. Oberoi is the Indian Norman Osborn, by the way. Nalin Oberoi, the Green Goblin.

Bollywood Studios Presents: Spiderman India:
The Musical On Greased Ice

The whole concept is totally novel. I think they have it at Borders. Come the Ides of May, it's mine.

Speaking of Ides, the Interact Rome Sketch rocks. Just a few of the reasons to watch the sketch.

1. There will be a gladiator.
   
2. A gladiator warrior bear.
   
3. A gladiator warrior bear played by Hari Kumar.

What more could you possibly want in a sketch? Also Thomas and Sharlene cut a pretty mean Caesar and Cleopatra. Only Sharlene has maybe one line. But she delivers it well. And Thomas is damned good at getting stabbed.

Did I forget to say that Nalin Oberoi's son is Hari Oberoi? This means that Hari will also be the Hobgoblin some day.

Two sites I have neglected to mention for too long are the Onion and Flintlocke's Guide to Azeroth. Well, no more.

Baby, You Mean The World Of Warcraft To Me

Come on, honey, why do you have to be like that? You know that you're my Elven princess. My one and only. I would dare say that there is no one in all the realm who doesn't know of our love. I have sung your praises from the mouth of the Shadowthread Cave to the Stranglethorn Vale of the Eastern Kingdoms. I've introduced you to my comrades-in-arms in the Ulster guild, and they all accept you as kin.

And now you want to dissolve the greatest love ever to brighten my basement?

When we met, I was looking for a group fit to take the Zul'Gurub instance. But as I stocked up on provisions at the convenience store before my quest, and our eyes locked, I realized that I was not looking for a group, I was looking for love, and I found it in you. You are the sun, the moon, the Cinderhide Armsplints of the Monkey. There is so much we have to offer one another. Unfailing loyalty, a Strength of 250, someone who can go out for snacks in the heat of battle. Can't you see we're made for each other?

Darling, no orc can keep me from you. I would make my way into the heart of Moonglade and fight an army of trolls just to be by your side. I would go up against Varimathras, the ruler of the Undead himself, if he so much as hinted that he was a danger to you. Make no mistake, I would get aggro on anyone who would threaten you.

This is, of course, provided the system is not down due to a faulty patch.

Don't you see that I did it all for you? My love for you exceeds Level 60, higher than anyone thought possible in this fantastic computer universe. My spirit soars when you are near. You restore my mana with a kiss. I even named my epic mount after you. Her name is Helen, and her hair shimmers in the sunlight, and together we ride forward into destiny.

I would climb the highest peak of Mount Hyjal to toil for 100 days and 100 nights in the mines in order to extract the precious ore so that I may fashion you a necklace of the finest thorium. My warrior, Hammuster, devoted his game's life to the professions of mining and smithing just so that I might accomplish that very thing. All you need do is join me in the WoW and hold the necklace up to the virtual sun. Then you may see the efforts I have expended to create this thing of beauty for you. The dishes can wait until tomorrow.

Helen, my mage, when I was ganked by a lowly rogue from Tennessee in the Caverns of Time and stripped of my treasured belongings, I rose from the grave with one purpose in mind. I had to be resurrected, not to seek revenge, but to return to you.

There is no other way to put it: You take my breath bar away.

Why do we need to go out to have fun? Everything we could possibly want is right in WoW. Fine dining, theater, romantic sunsets—they're all there. The outside world just costs money, and I don't have a magic breastplate to protect me from people's stares. Come with me so I can treat you like the princess you are.

Please, baby, if you leave, you will increase by 32 percent the chance of doing direct damage to my heart. Please reconsider.

Taken from The Onion and Flintlocke's Guide To Azeroth.

Summer Ends + Profoundity

Yeah you heard that right. Wishworld updates next Saturday. Which is also the date for the Interact Club's IU Day. Boon Guan and Jing Hang will be promoting it tomorrow morning at the assembly. Everyone better pay attention and come! We have worked hard on this.

Also: Sometimes I find MSN to be just deeply intricate and somehow, profound.

Profoundity indeed.

On Comics + Chuck Norris

I said there would be editing. This page is now about Chuck Norris. Scroll down.

There is also a very important question for all Wishmakers, at the end. Read and reply! If there is insufficient feedback the series will not move forward.

Comicky day.

I finished my Sam and Fuzzy contest entry (which I like the end product of very much considering how I rushed it all in about one night).

At first I was all hyped up, then I slacked off and almost forgot about it until Mark reminded me just yesterday. He submitted his own entry, go check it out. Pills!

"There are only three days left to enter the art contest and make your bid for a special Plaid Edition Sam and Fuzzy book. Don't let the plaid book become your Mr. T mall visit. You'll regret it later!" - Sam Logan

For those of you too lazy to click and find out what a Mr. T mall visit is, being a nice-ish person I am accomodating of your tubby, finger cramped selves.

"You're right, Marge. Just like the time I could have met Mr. T at the mall. The entire day, I kept saying, 'I'll go a little later, I'll go a little later...' And when I got there, they told me he just left. And when I asked the mall guy if he'll ever come back again, he said he didn't know. Well, I'm never going to let something like that happen again!" - Homer

But you should click it anyway. It leads to a priceless collection of Simpsons things!

Remember what I said about people and things like Pook being connected through their hearts? As it turns out... Pooh doesn't have much of a heart. Just fluff and blood.

More comics and quotes tommorow. I am late for sleep. And that Interact IU thingamabob which I *have* done *halfway*.

"Yeah, I eat Nefarions for breakfast. I mean, my Stainless Steel server normal elf protection warrior has to train in the Underworld now! Of course there's such a thing as an Underworld! What do you think the Undercity's part of? There's an Understate and Undercountry too. Duh." - Jun Ian

On Chuck Norris

No explanation is required. You do not question Chuck Norris.

There is a Chuck Norris fact generator that draws from a database of four thousand. The site also includes a Vin Diesel and Mr. T facts database. It can be found here. The site includes a Top 100 Facts for Chuck Norris. Some of the list:

1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
2. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
3. Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
4. Originally, Jawbreakers were in the shape of Chuck Norris' fist.
5. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
6. Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
7. Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
8. They say that lightning never strikes the same place twice. Niether does Chuck Norris. He doesn't have to.
9. When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
10. Chuck Norris has only one hand: the upper hand.
11. Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

Chuck Norris has his own list of favorite jokes about himself. The list and article is here. For those of you adverse to clicking links, here's the list anyway.

From a list of Chuck Norris' favorite Chuck Norris jokes:

1. When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
2. Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water and make it drink.
3. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
4. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up - he's pushing the Earth down.
5. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
6. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
7. Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
8. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
9. Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
10. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
11. Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
12. There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
13. Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
14. Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.
15. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
16. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
17. Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a Delta Force marathon on Satellite TV.
    

Important Question for Wishmakers: Wishworld continues in Black and White? This will increase the base quality and production speed. But well, it just won't be in colour any more. Yes or no? Pressure!

Keyblade War

Maps removed. Event over. That was cool. Paintball hurts. Home movies lame.

Funny how two simple words can make my blood boil with anticipation.

Keyblade war.

Damn. I don't think I've been looking forward to a new game so eagerly since... well, since the first Kingdom Hearts. This is my current wallpaper. 1024 just so you know.

I spent about thirty hours beating the game on proud mode. Worth every minute. I even bought into that teddy bear crap. Y'know, where Sora and Winnie the Pooh talk about how they'll never be apart no matter where they are cause they'll always be connected through their hearts.

It was sickeningly sweet, a purely Disney moment in every sense of the word and I loved it to bits. It reminded me of the time I watched that Winnie the Pooh movie (the Great Adventure or whatnot; the one with the cave) where Pooh and Christopher Robin made the exact same promise to each other. I was a kid and I almost cried (I think). I love Winnie the Pooh.

I love Winnie the Pooh.

That's the other thing that was so great about Kingdom Hearts. Before I played the game, I didn't give a rat's anatomy about Chicken Little, and I thought that having him in the game would suck on so many levels. By the time I finished, he was the one summon I used the most.

It could only be Disney magic.

This is a first for me in video games. I had gotten to know all the characters so well that towards the end of the game I wanted a happy ending so bad. I loved them; Sora, Riku, Kairi, Mickey, Donald, Goofy, Roxas, Namine... I really wanted all of them to be safe. I really kept thinking that something bad would happen to them, or that they would die before they made it home. What happened in the end... well, I think I'll wait for more people to finish the game before I spoil it.

The one, possibly best thing about Kingdom Hearts II was the secret movie I unlocked for unlocking all the worlds on proud mode. If you haven't seen it... well, it's good.

Play Kingdom Hearts. Play Kingdom Hearts. Play Kingdom Hearts. The game, I mean. I do hope this subliminal messaging doesn't backfire when you somehow end up with the sex toy.

Now for a conversation only WoW players will fully appreciate. Or people who pretend to play WoW. People like me.

Jason: Non-epic mount people, shut up.
Jun Ian: I think you're the only one in the whole school with an epic mount.
Jason: Yeah.
Jun Ian: Apart from me, that is.
Jason: ...Of course.
Jun Ian: My epic mount levelled up last night.
Jason: Really. What level is it now?
Jun Ian: Level two. I have a level two epic mount.
Jason: My epic mount is level sixty two.
Jun Ian: Cool. Guess what? I soloed Jonathan Marcus last night.
Jason: It's Marcus Jonathan.
Jun Ian: Yeah... it was his brother.
Jason: I see. What class are you?
Jun Ian: I'm a warrior. An... elf warrior.
Jason: Don't you mean night elf?
Jun Ian: No, it's a normal elf.
Jason: That's a blood elf.
Jun Ian: A normal elf.
Jason: What the hell is a normal elf?
Jun Ian: It's my class!
Jason: Race.
Jun Ian: Whatever. I have a level sixty alt, you know.
Jason: Doesn't everyone?
Jun Ian: He's a... tauren hunter. Uses a bow.
Jason: I can almost believe that. Only you're even more full of lies than Daniel. The worst thing that ever came out of him was some nonsense about a mushroom sword in RO.
Jun Ian: Hah! Do you know the Wuuf?
Jason: The Wuuf. Yeah I know him.
Jun Ian: Is that so? What class is he?
Jason: He's one of those new classes.
Jun Ian: No, he's a priest. He's been a level sixty priest since the weekend the servers opened.
Jason: Yeah right.
Jun Ian: Do you not read Flintlocke?
Jason: Do you know who Leeroy is?
Jun Ian: Leeeeroy Jenkins.
Jason: Yup. Who is he?
Jun Ian: One of my alts.

First Weekend of April 2006

Warning: This post is not for casual reading. It is damnably long, and was intended to be read throughly. Sections of it were written during a fitful doze, so some parts may not make sense. You have been warned.

Brian: So your class is going to the spastic center huh?
Rufus: Yeah, 4K and 4W are going.
Brian(4P): The two most retarded classes la.
Rufus(4K): Oh Brian, you're confusing your class with my class again.

When yesterday ended I considered it one of the best days of my life. Going treasure hunting with half the form, watching Inside Man and playing the new Kingdom Hearts makes for an pretty much unbeatable combination.

After today I know the truth. This has been, as far as my memory serves, the best weekend of my life.

Like, no shit.

Why? Cause today was my birthday, which I was initially going to spend playing more Kingdom Hearts (which by the way contains toxic amounts of kick ass).

But as it turned out some people had other ideas.

Conspiracy.

This is the buildup.

Wednesday, Cafeteria.

Peak Sheng: So that's twenty from you, and from Komala. Daniel, do you want to contribute?
Jun Ian: Hey guys. Peak Sheng, why do you have so much money?
Peak Sheng: Hustling.
Wai Khuin: Do you know why? Peak Sheng, I'll tell him okay?
Peak Sheng: Wai Khuin!
Wai Khuin: They're starting a PS3 fund for me. Do you wanna contribute?
Jun Ian: I'm sure.

Everyone laughs.

Thursday, Basketball Court.

Peak Sheng: So we gotta keep on...

Wai Khuin sees me on approach.

Wai Khuin: Hey, Jun Ian! The PS3 fund is really starting to come alive!
Peak Sheng: Good one, Wai Khuin!
Jun Ian: ... ...

Later.

Wai Khuin: You can't be that blur right? You do know what we're doing right?
Jun Ian: What?
Wai Khuin: Oh my god, you are that blur.
Jun Ian: Or maybe I'm just, you know, pretending to be blur.
Wai Khuin: I don't think so.

Friday, The Inter Net.

[10:36:14 PM] Peak0 - projekt G.I.G. : oh, btw. how much are those FX
lightsabers? im thinking of getting one.
[10:36:51 PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : 500-600
[10:37:06 PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : a lot
[10:37:07 PM] Peak0 - projekt G.I.G. : ouch.
[10:37:25 PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : yes
[10:38:14 PM] Peak0 - projekt G.I.G. : back to the drawing board
[10:38:40:PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : the drawing board... of... what
[10:38:44 PM] Peak0 - projekt G.I.G. : so how do u plan to jive in my side of the story
[10:39:22 PM] Peak0 - projekt G.I.G. : how to save more money for that thing
[10:39:36 PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : ...
[10:39:39 PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : pimp more
[10:39:49 PM] Peak0 - projekt G.I.G. : u planning on ever getting one?
[10:39:55 PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : eventually
[10:40:07 PM] [d] kingdom. hearts. TWO. : remember my story about the man, the boy and the plastic tube?
[10:40:14 PM] Peak0 - projekt G.I.G. : erm, vaguely
[10:40:25 PM] [d] kingodm. hearts. TWO. : yeah, I need to see if the impression sticks.

Saturday, Treasure Hunt Aftermath.

Peak Sheng: So, I'm taking Clarissa to 1U later.
Jun Ian: Why?
Peak Sheng: Oh she has some shopping to do.
Jun Ian: Shopping? Can I come along? I wanna watch V for Vendetta.
Peak Sheng: I don't think that's such a good idea.
Jun Ian: Why is that?
Peak Sheng: My mom might not be able to take you.
Jun Ian: You have a big car.
Peak Sheng: Yes... I do.
Mahadi: I wanna watch V for Vendetta too. Come on, Jun Ian, let's go to KLCC and abuse our Treasure Hunt shirts on the LRT.
Jun Ian: 1U is easier for me.

Peak Sheng speaks to his mom on the phone.

Peak Sheng: Don't take too many people la... she says she might not be able to send you.
Jun Ian: Me and Mahadi... that's all.
Peak Sheng: Also she uh just... cleaned the car. So if you're all dirty you shouldn't get in.
Jun Ian: I changed my clothes and now I'm at least as clean as you.
Peak Sheng: I... I guess it's all right.

Peak Sheng's mom arrives.

Peak Sheng: Jun Ian, you should go sit in the car first. Mahadi and I will wait here for Clarissa.
Jun Ian: Uh, okay.

Later, 1U.

Peak Sheng: Yeah, Clarissa and I are going to be in Coffee Bean for awhile. You go get your Kingdom Hearts.
Mahadi: Come on Jun Ian, let's go.

Received Key Item: Kingdom Hearts.

Jun Ian: Hey look it's Peak Sheng and Clarissa! Moving fast, too. Let's go over and say hi.
Mahadi: Um, yeah...
Peak Sheng: Yeah, then we should go get the...
Jun Ian: There were like six guys with Kingdom Hearts! It's everywhere!
Peak Sheng: Holy shit where did you come from?
Clarissa: Where's Mahadi?
Jun Ian: Across the way. You guys made it here pretty fast huh?
Clarissa: What's so good about this game?
Jun Ian: That there in the corner is Jack Sparrow.
Peak Sheng: Aren't you going to watch a movie or something?
Mahadi: We just came from TGV (or GSC, I always get them mixed up).
Jun Ian: V for Vendetta is 18PL apparently. And both Inside Man and V for Vendetta start around six anyway. I should be gone by that time.
Peak Sheng: Try the new cinema. Come on, we should be going.
Jun Ian: Yeah. Clarissa, can I have my game back?

Mahadi gets a call from Peak Sheng.

Mahadi: Yes, Sparkles. Yes I have fifty bucks. Hell no. Alright, see ya.
Jun Ian: What was that all about?
Mahadi: Clarissa needs fifty bucks for some shopping thing.
Jun Ian: I have fifty bucks.

Short Messaging Service.

Jun Ian: Why do you need fifty bucks?
Peak Sheng: Clarissa's short on cash.
Jun Ian: I can lend you fifty bucks if you really want it.
Peak Sheng: That's okay we got the money from Aiman.

Sunday Morning, Short Messaging Service.

Pia: Hey, happy sweet sixteen. =p Hope you have a great day...
Jun Ian: Thanks but I already had my great day yesterday and I doubt I'll be as lucky again.
Pia: Ah well. You never know.

Later, In Da Car.

Mom: Yeah, I have to go back to 1U. I left my watch there to get fixed yesterday.
Jun Ian: You're wearing your watch.
Mom: My other watch.
Jun Ian: So what are we having for lunch?
Dad: Jamin said she wanted Pizza last night.
Jun Ian: Pizza Hut?
Dad: So let's go to Shakey's.

Later, 1U.

Jun Ian: Rachel!
Rachel: New phone!

Rachel moves on.

Jun Ian: Who asked?

Kite shop (with kites).

Jun Ian: Azfar!
Azfar: Happy Birthday man!
Jun Ian: What are you doing here?
Azfar: Family stuff.
Jun Ian: Is that... Kingdom Hearts II?
Azfar: Yeah.

Shakey's Pizza.

Jun Ian: Let's sit here. Perfect spot!
Mom: Nah, let's sit outside.
Jun Ian: Why outside? One whole section has been reserved!

Outside.

Jun Ian: It is hot! Let's go in.
Mom: Wait here and I will tell them to turn on the fans.
Jun Ian: I'm going to the bathroom.

On the way to the Bathroom.

Jun Ian: Yoong Jie! Dexter! Azfar!
Dexter: Uh, hey.
Jun Ian: What the hell? Why are you guys here and why didn't you tell me?
Azfar: Hey man. I have family stuff.
Dexter: Yeah, I'm going to watch a movie with some people.
Yoong Jie: I'm just... here.

At the foot of the escalator.

Jun Ian: Wai Khuin!
Wai Khuin: Hey.
Jun Ian: What are you doing here? What's in that bag?
Wai Khuin: Present for Dass.
Jun Ian: An MU hat? How could you possess such a thing? Doesn't it burn you?
Wai Khuin: That is why it's in a plastic bag.
Jun Ian: When is Dass's birthday anyway?
Azfar: It's tomorrow.
Jun Ian: The what now.
Wai Khuin: Okay Jun Ian here is your present.

Wai Khuin presents pens.

Wai Khuin: I... was not able to remove the price tags.

The price tags are legible, but badly scratched and mangled.

Wai Khuin: But I did make an effort.
Jun Ian: Okay.
Mahadi: Hey.
Jun Ian: What is this? A twilight zone reunion? Why are you here?
Dexter: Hey Mahadi.
Mahadi: I'm just here because Peak Sheng asked me to be here.
Jun Ian: So he's here too? That's one crazy string of coincidences.

Back at Shakey's Pizza.

Jun Ian: And there are so many people here today! Maybe I should call them here and force Shern to buy us a cheese cake.
Mom: Maybe you shouldn't do that.
Jun Ian: This place is really... Eugene? What the hell.
Eugene: Hey.
Jun Ian: How did you find me? Did they tell you I was here?
Eugene: No, I was just... passing through. Here's your birthday card.

Eugene leaves.

Jun Ian: What???

Then the cavalry arrives. En masse. Peak Sheng. Michael. Eugene. Mark. Pardeep. Eliot. Jason. Dexter. Azfar. Dassila. Wai Khuin. Ben Kane. Yoong Jie. Mahadi. Pia. Sabrina.

Jun Ian: What the hell? Who told you that I was -

I turn to my mom.

Jun Ian: YOU!

And the rest, they say, is history.

Recorded history. Observe the following from the criminal files of the FBI.

It was about as seedy a gathering as the world had ever seen. Every criminal in the city from kingpins to street urchins were meeting in an unprecedented move by the Big Cheese himself to unite the gangs and take the city from beyond the grasp of the law.

Crime lords, drug pushers, hitmen, con artists, hustlers... the guest list read like the who's who of criminology.

A den of evil incarnate.

It started out alright, as the hoods got down doing gangsterly activities. Like playing pool.

And playing J-pop dancing games.

But criminals being criminals, several fights inevitably broke out.

By the time order was restored, it was discovered that the Big Cheese had met with an unfortunate "accident".

According to witness accounts this is the last time anyone ever saw the Big Cheese. Alive.

It was, however, general opinion that he did leave a rather dashing corpse.

A mysterious weapon was soon discovered at the scene of the "accident". Of course, the double inverted commas represent unmistakable evidence that the "accident" was no "accident" at all. It was... murder. DUM DUM DUM.

This is a case photo of the suspected murder weapon.

It is uncertain how the weapon was smuggled past security, but it is believed that it was somehow hidden in the food. This hints at an inside accomplice, and we believe our cameras have found just the person.

The lady in green is seen only once throughout the entire proceedings, sipping coffee at a restaraunt that serves no coffee. This hints at shady origins. Where did this coffee come from? Where was the lady in green at the time of the "accident"? But even so she could only have been an accomplice and not the murderer, as the following evidence proves.

After questioning it was determined that only one of three suspects could have performed the... murder. DUM DUM DUM.

The first is this man. Mohammad Azfar, convicted cereal killer.
He was released from death row after surviving the chair, the gas chamber and the firing squad through sheer stubborness. This was seen as by the warden as a sign that he was a man protected by God, and Azfar walked (on water).
In this picture he is in the act of putting a pool ball to sleep. Permanently.

A video of him in conversation with the deceased minutes before the "accident" was found in the security archives. Audio was lacking but our expert lip-reading experts from the Malaysian Association for the Blind have managed to fill in some of the gaps for us. The following is their transcript of the conversation.

*transcript begins*

"So glad you could join me, [unknown, possibly 'as far']."
"What do you want, Cheese?"
"Paranoid as always. Can't a man have a [unknown, no matches] talk with one of his friends?"
"You've got no friends, Cheese. And I know you didn't call me here to help you eat ice cream, so out with it - what do you want?"
"You cut me deep, [unknown, possibly 'as far']. Real deep."
"Is this about the [unknown, possibly 'few shun ring']? Because I thought we were already over that."
"Cool it, [unknown, possibly 'as far']. Whatever happens in Wai Kit Road, stays in Wai Kit Road. Remember? This is not about that night. Nights."
"Then what is it about?"
"[unknown, possibly ' chocolate cake']."

*transcript ends*

The second suspect is this woman. Last seen January 28th 2006 at the crime scene of the Chinese New Year case, she was then known only as the woman in brown. We now know her name is Cruella De Vil the Third, and like her mother and grandmother harbors a fetish for fur, especially dog fur. She is suspected as an accomplice because of previous involvement with Azfar, during an incident where she alledgedly saved him from a puppy named Vicious. Yes. That incident.

The third and final suspect is Jonathan "Sparkles" Tan, so named for his secret mutant power to make things sparkle. He has been charged for multiple attempts at grand theft auto and is also suspected of prize fraud in last year's Defence of the Ancients competition. He is seen (far left) in this picture with a group of people all dressed the same. Who are these fashion victims? Clearly the mysterious cult group known only as Organization V.

This picture was taken the day before the... murder. DUM DUM DUM. It shows more supposed members of Organization V. A cryptic message, Start/Finish can be seen. What could it mean? Clearly something sinister. But not half as suspicious as the mysterious Hot Link. What is this link? Could it be the key to linking this case together?

This picture of him with a unnamed man wielding the mysterious weapon was found in an anonymous tipoff. This is obviously a standoff of some sort, which (hypothetically) ended with the unnamed man launching the weapon and his entire body into the suspect's left eye at approximately the speed of sound. While this matches the fact that insults were directed at the assailant's mother some time earlier, it does not match the fact that both victim and assailant of this supposed attack are seen alive in this next picture.

Conspiracy.

This coded message was later discovered at the scene of the... murder. DUM DUM DUM.

Within the envelope were photographs from a terrorist training cell. It was a clue that only led to more questions.

Upon closer inspection, it was a letter to the Big Cheese from one of the other crime lords in attendance, informing him that the situation had escalated and warning him of hidden dangers. The letter reads as follows.

The situation has been escalated. Beware of hidden dangers.

- Crime Lord

P.S. - Nope no one has seen Azfar. I heard about that ice cream problem of yours. Good luck getting him to help you eat it.

The message, apparently never reached Big Cheese. The messager was sidetracked at the event.

He had some business with an orphan named Voon, who may or may not have been involved in the... murder. DUM DUM DUM.

The mystery remains unsolved, but clues point to a secretive but all-powerful shadow organization as the puppet masters.

The evidence seems clear, but the FBI is again baffled. Once again they want you, faithful readers, to have the final say on the case. So tell us. What really happened to Big Cheese? Tell us what you think!

You can make a difference.

A final, baffling addition to the case: neither of the previous stated possibilities explain the suspicious actions of this man.